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Writer's pictureROGER H. TALL, M.D.

ON BECOMING GMOs



The two bikini girls were spitting mad. They had just come up from the beach to the public outdoor shower to clean off the sand and saltwater. Their own shampoo seemed to be working well until they tried to rinse it from their hair. Each time they rinsed, the lather just increased into more thick suds. They looked at each other in frustrated disbelief, standing under the shower, dripping in sudsy shampoo. You may have seen this boorish prank video. The man on the stairway directly above the shower spigot stands out of sight. Whenever the girls put their heads under the shower, the prankster squeezed yet another dollop of dishwashing liquid on the unsuspecting victims and then hide back behind the stairwell. The prankster pulled his trick on other beach-goers, but it was the girl’s reaction that stayed with me.


One of the girls grabbed her bottle of all-natural shampoo and held it up, right in front of her nose in order to see the label through the cascading foam. She complained to the other, “I can’t get this stuff out of my hair! What’s in this? It says right here on the bottle that this is organic, all-natural, vegan, has probiotics, and is non-GMO — so, why is this happening?” The prankster called down from above explained that they were being videoed for a pranky shampoo spoof. Their anger and frustration melted away when they realized this was supposed to be a joke and that their all-natural shampoo had not failed them. They seemed happy to be able to get on their way — all clean and rinsed. All this pranking got me thinking about the girl’s reaction and focus. They were so afraid of being exposed to something genetically modified that they missed out on the fact that they had been shampooing with Dawn -- a powerful detergent, designed to remove baked-on food and goo and so powerful that it has been used to clean up birds and animals after oil spills. Generously soaping up with this rich lather would have created a hairdo management nightmare. At least they could be reassured that Dawn is non-GMO.



As hard as we may try to be all-natural, we live in a GMO world. Those who like to worry about everything should be free to choose to try to avoid contacting GMOs all of their days. However, no one seems to have noticed, and it may be published here for the first time — people choosing to get vaccinated for COVID-19, have newly engineered genetic chips of mRNA injected into and floating around in their own personal biospheres. This is a genetic modification. They have become genetically modified organisms themselves. There is just no getting around it. Everyone who has been vaccinated has become a genetically modified organism. On a molecular level, this actually is an exciting development and presents an option rich with irony. What will become of the organic, all-natural crowd when they realize that they have become GMOs? Maybe they will identify as being non-GMO and applauded for their courage to fight the GMO stigma.


Rich irony is like rich lather — sometimes you just can’t get it out of your hair.


Ever vigilant,


RT

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